Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Bend Over Grandpa...It's Time To Get Your Wrinkly Ass To Wal-Mart

Don't you just love when a plan goes off without a hitch?

For example, this bit about the IMF:

A few years back, there was a fear in some parts about black UN helicopters that were supposedly taking part in the planning of an invasion of the United States. While there was no foundation for this fear, there is basis for concern about the attack of another international organization, the International Monetary Fund (IMF).

Last week, the IMF told the United States that it needs to start getting its budget deficit down. It put cutting Social Security at the top of the steps that the country should take to achieve deficit reduction.

seques nicely into this:

WASHINGTON – The federal deficit has topped $1 trillion with three months still to go in the budget year, showing the lasting impact of the recession on the government's finances.

In its monthly budget report, the Treasury Department said Tuesday that through the first nine months of this budget year, the deficit totals $1 trillion. That's down 7.6 percent from the $1.09 trillion deficit run up during the same period a year ago.

Worries about the size of the deficit have created political problems for the Obama administration. Congressional Republicans and moderate Democrats have blocked more spending on job creation and other efforts. Republicans also have held up legislation to extend unemployment benefits for the long-term jobless because of its effect on the deficit.

Another failed effort would have provided cash-starved states with money to help avoid layoff of public employees and finance the Medicaid program for the poor and disabled.

It's almost looks like the world follows a script, doesn't it?

Oh well, I'm sure all the seniors were growing bored with retirement anyway.
Who, in their right mind, would want to relax & enjoy life when the humiliation of a low paying menial job is just waiting for a body?

Hopefully, this will be the first step to a brighter tomorrow, when all the useless eaters, liberal whiners, & lazy sickly grandmas can be safely rounded up & marched off to the nearest McDonald's & shoved into Big McSoylent Macs & tasty McSoylent Nuggets. Once we begin utilizing all that juicy long pig that's just lying around wasting tax dollars, I'm sure we won't even miss all that oil damaged sea food.
Wouldn't you choose a finely toasted Down's Syndrome money waster over a creepy crawly ocean bug any day of the week?

C'mon, be honest.


Anonymous said...

Fuck yeah, man.

ericswan said...

ARGHANDAB Afghanistan (Reuters) - U.S. Staff Sergeant Aaron Best made no apologies as his soldiers escorted 14-year-old Ahmad, blindfolded and handcuffed, onto their outpost in southern Afghanistan for questioning.

"Don't be fooled," said Best, "I have detained so many teenagers. These fighters are getting younger and younger."

Ahmad, whose real name has been concealed to protect his identity, was picked up by a U.S. patrol along with a 15-year-old boy in Arghandab, in southern Kandahar province, one of Afghanistan's most volatile regions, because they were behaving suspiciously.

Ahmad and his friend were hiding in vegetation, observing the soldiers, when they were spotted. The boys scurried away and when Best's men finally caught up to them they tried to resist arrest, making the soldiers even more suspicious.

Both boys, along with several older detainees picked up on the patrol, tested positive for traces of ammonium nitrate on their hands, a chemical found in gunpowder and explosives. Ammonium nitrate is also found in certain fertilizers and, although they are banned in Afghanistan because they can be used to make homemade bombs, they are still used by some farmers. The detainees could simply have been farm laborers.

Ahmad and the others were kept overnight for questioning by Afghan police and released the next day to village elders who said they would vouch for them.

Whether or not Ahmad and his 15-year-old friend had been laying homemade bombs or had even fired weapons at U.S. troops before, Best's men will probably never find out, but the arrests illustrate a worrying trend reported from soldiers on the ground: that they are encountering an increasingly younger fighter.

"Over the last eight to nine years there has been a dynamic change in the age of fighters. Most fighters now are between 14 and 18 years-old," said Lieutenant Colonel Guy Jones, commander of 2-508th Parachute Regiment, 82nd Airborne Division, based in Arghandab.

"In 2002, fighters were 22 to 30-years-old and commanders were between 32 and 40," said Jones who is on his fourth tour in Afghanistan.

Jones pulls out a piece of paper from his pocket to illustrate his point. On the paper are the names of recently captured detainees with their photographs beside them. Their ages range from 14 to 20.

One wounded boy caught firing a weapon at U.S. forces is now recovering in hospital at the main foreign air base in Kandahar. He is only 13, said Jones.


Jones said the young fighters were being coerced into joining the insurgency.

"These kids are looking at their elders and grandfathers as the great mujahideen, with respect, and they want to emulate them," said Jones, referring to the men who fought against the Soviet occupation during the 1980s.

"The Taliban are pressuring young fighters to fight like their grandfathers and telling them: 'Hey, be like them.'"

Whatever the reasons, it makes Best and his men wary of nearly everyone they meet on their patrol, and Afghanistan has one of the youngest populations in the world.

Each time the soldiers patrol out of their outpost in Arghandab, a white kite is hoisted up from a nearby village.

The soldiers know they have Taliban "spotters" around the area and that these are most likely children, but when they have challenged the kite fliers they claim ignorance. For the soldiers it has happened too many time to be a coincidence.

This time Staff Sergeant Best agreed with the Afghan police to let the detainees go, saying it could help build up a rapport with the community, but the platoon commander's frustration was palpable.

"At the end of the day we don't have enough evidence on them and keeping them in for another two days will only turn the village against us," he said.

"It's like you really have to catch them putting the bomb in or firing a gun at us for something to happen."

ericswan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bigfoot said...

Geez, and here I was listening to... youtube.com/watch?v=W2zkN74s72M
tryin to wind the hell down. If I had some energy I think I'd quite like Clutch, but this robot's worn out from work and in need of sleep. Dickie, as usual I enjoyed your post mate. I won't get started on the fckn IMF! Cheers, Bfoot.

Morocco Bama said...

It's not all bad. Yeah, these austerity measures suck. I needed that unemployment check to put food on the table, and my mother will perish in a year, or two, without social security or medicare, but at least it's being replaced with things like I-Dose. You best get your I-Dose whilst it's free. It's still in Trials and so it's free, but not for long. Soylent Green is People and The Internet is Drugs. Isn't listening to Glenn Beck a form of I-Dosing? How about an Obama speech? We've seen how he can mesmerize the sheep with his oratorical powers. The War On Drugs finds a new venue. Who would have thunk? We would have, that's who.


Morocco Bama said...

Big Foot, that was pleasantly haunting. Thanks for sharing it. We could have a field day interpreting it. Who wants to start?

just_another_dick said...

BF, I agree with Shrub, the music was quite good.

Hey Shrub, the thing I loved most was the one senator who said that extending unemployment would just encourage people to avoid looking for a job.

Now that's a big "fuck you America" joke isn't it?

& Eric, do you have a problem with torturing or executing children?
That's not very red white & blue of you.
You'd better stay in Canada.
Hell, I'd join you, if I could.

ericswan said...

I just got banned from godlikeproductions again. Hmm. I think it was the part where I was saying that the gulf is intentionally being killed off so they can grow algae to make methanol and solve the energy problem of Amerika with renewable energy that is "not off the grid". That was a conundrum for everyone what with supressing every kind of technology for free energy that has been developed over the past 100 years but this algae thing. Well, it needs a co2 environment and the corexit is busy killing off all life and surfer dudes that seem to think they have a vested interest in the gulf.


just_another_dick said...

Consider yourself lucky Eric. I just paid my first visit to godlike productions & after 5 minutes of the endless emoticons & little animated thing-a-ma-bobs that appear to be embedded in every forum post I went ahead & banned myself.

just_another_dick said...

Eric, I read one thread there detailing how 911 was foretold in movies & TV, even going as far back as a 1949 Porky Pig cartoon. So, I was wondering, do conspiracy wonks think they bolster their case by doing this crap?
Saying that the Twin Towers fall was predicted in '49 before the Towers were even built really just makes these folk look as crazy as popular perception portrays them.
This is an extreme example, but the other clips, while contemporary, also seemed to be stretching things a bit, to say the least.

Jesus, one can do this with anything.
For example, my daughter Molly was born 2 months before 911 and her birth weight was 9 pounds 11 ounces.
Does this make her a metaphysical avatar of the coming "false flag" attack?
I once read a psychic who said the Messiah is alive now. He/she/it was born in 1962 but he/she/it has no idea he/she/it is the Messiah.
Well, I was born in 1962 & I have absolutely no idea that I'm the Messiah. Does this make me the Messiah?

Again, take your banning as a fortuitous bit of luck. I doubt those folk could find a cannonball inside a cannon, let alone the secret machinations of the uber elite.

Morocco Bama said...

Our good buddy, Glenn, is crying like a little baby again. Sorry, Glenn, I can find no sympathy for you. In fact, if that's all that happens to you, you're getting off awfully light.


Morocco Bama said...

How about some Debtor Prisons to go along with that Austerity Sandwich?


An excerpt, but read the whole thing:

If the debtor doesn't show up to that hearing, the hammer of justice can come down hard and fast. From there, the judge can order the debtor in contempt of court and issue a warrant for their arrest. If this seems unnecessarily punitive, the price to get out of jail is even more so, say consumer advocates: Generally, the judge sets the cost of bail at the amount of the disputed debt, an amount which is then turned over to the creditor.

"This is the private use of government resources to collect debt," Pete Barry, partner at law firm Barry & Slade LLC, told Walletpop. One of Barry's clients was arrested at her workplace for not filling out and sending back a form demanded by the creditor. The client, Barry says, suffered the humiliation of having to have her boss come to the jail and post a bond before she could be released. The bond money, he added, was turned over to the creditor. "They're using the court system as their collection agent," he says.

Bigfoot said...

Morocco, you sound like the kind of man who'd deny that dinosaur fossils are the sculptures of Satan. Glenn may come across as a sniveling snot face in skid marked adult diapers, but hell no mr, no way. This is a very deep sensitive man who wrestles with the forces of darkness on a daily basis. Unlike us, he doesn't need physical eyes to see. The light of Elohim will lead him on his path to rule over his own planet one day, where upon he will take his throne as God, from whence he can spray his precious, super sweet, divine seed.

Bigfoot said...

And for those who like to play Judas Priest records backwards, Elohim spelt backwards is mihole. The plot thickens..

just_another_dick said...

Shrub & B.F., I really don't tell many folk this but Glenn Beck has touched my heart with his deep love for America.

His is a love that is pure & straight & wholesome & red white & blue to its core.
That's why Obama feared him enough to can that USDA worker. He didn't want to attract the ire of Glenn's truth seeking media laser.

Glenn knows about black on white racism better than most, having grown up as an indentured servant in the home of Quincy Jones.
There were nights when Miles Davis would stop over & Davis & Quincy would belittle Glenn's genital inadequacies while regaling Glenn with tales of all the white women they've screwed over the years.

At night, Glenn would cry alone in the little abandoned port-a-potty that Jones had converted into Glenn's living quarters.
Glenn would vow, again & again, that if God would grant him the grace to wear the magic Mormon underwear he would expose the vile black on white racism wherever it rears its ugly face.

Thankfully, the divinely inspired fair & balanced folk at FOX News realized how important Glenn was to God's plan and they gave him a venue to spread the truth.

Personally, I suspect Glenn's blindness, much like Reagan's Alzheimers, is viral in nature & was developed deep in the bowels of some liberally progressive Berkeley
bio-warfare lab.

As I understand it, the virus was used to coat Glenn's chalk, this being the "sword of truth" Mr. Beck wields to enlighten the progressively brainwashed masses to the menace that nips at their heels.

Glenn Beck is truly a 21st century prophet & we are quite lucky to have him.

Morocco Bama said...

Great stuff, Richard and Big Foot. I laughed so hard, I crapped my pants. I need to head out for a new case.


just_another_dick said...

But...but Shrub, I'm being completely serious.
Here's one more little known gem of Beck-lore.

Glenn's latest book, The Overton Window, has had many forms over the years. He originally began it those long years ago, huddled in the port-a-potty, scribbling madly on scraps of discarded toilet paper.
Sometimes he only had tiny chunks not much bigger than those found on a cartoon bear's backside.

I won't even get into what the poor man used as a marking implement.

At that time, the book was known as "I Wish I Had A Window."

But that's OK. Great minds evolve, don't they?


Morocco Bama said...


Cheers, you say in relation to a Glenn Beck post. How did you know?


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