Sunday, March 21, 2010

2 Observations & A Fart

1. While over at the RI forum, I found an article listed about a gathering of "gun folk" across the Potomac from the nation's capital. They call themselves The Three Percenters and they type some incredibly funny shit. Unintentionally that is.

But I tell you this: We will not go gently into that bloody collectivist good night. Indeed, we will make with our defiance such a sound as ALL history from that day forward will be forced to note, even if they despise us in the writing of it.

And when we are gone, the scattered, free survivors hiding in the ruins of our once-great republic will sing of our deeds in forbidden songs, tending the flickering flame of individual liberty until it bursts forth again, as it must, generations later. We will live forever, like the Spartans at Thermopylae, in sacred memory.

-- Mike Vanderboegh, The Lessons of Mumbai:Death Cults, the "Socialism of Imbeciles" and Refusing to Submit, 1 December 2008

I started thinking, what is it about this country and motherfucking guns? Herr Bushski was practicing his own version of "pooch screwing" & "Constitutional dick wiping" that was made popular by Oberfuhrer Reagan, and not a fucking peep out of these people. I mean, how come there weren't huge gatherings of people "on the Potomac" with fucking library books, protesting Herr Bushskis creepy little intellectual peep show snooping into library records?
Why is it always guns?
Do these guys live in some weird little illusory action movie? Do they wake up and realize that what their wife moaned during sex was "OOOOOOOOOO Brucie...?"
This after watching a Die Hard double feature?
Does their manhood shrivel, forcing other, phallic gods, into their hands?

2. Today, while at work, I watched assorted babbling puppet heads yammer on about healthcare. One little Pinocchio kept reiterating the tired line that "government can't run anything successfully."
I thought, y'know, they're right.
So why do we let them run the military?
That has to be the most bloated, overfunded, and totally useless waste of tax dollars ever foisted on the American people.
So today, as a, as a patriot and a student of patriots, I hereby offer to assume control of the military immediately.
Y'all can install the nukes in my front yard tomorrow.
60 days from then, you'd better have worked out all your differences & healed all your self inflicted social wounds
or we're all dead.

Good Night.

pppfffffffffffffffftttttttttttttt....ah, smell it.

(this isn't really a 3rd observation, it's just what I was thinking while I farted.)

I know that last bit makes me look as homicidal as our masters, but, keep in mind, I'm offering to go along. Unlike the whiz bang adjunct to the Cold War M.A.D. strategy of mutually assured destruction, that gave our leaders, the ones who decide to annihilate the rest of us, massive well stocked underground bunkers to hide in while the rest of us turn to cinders or corpses. Paid for by us, the expendable, for the imbecilic sake of "continuity of government."
My ass.
More like "continuity of their asses."
More like "continuity of humanity."
Now imagine the implications...a future human animal based on the illicit seed of a Nixon or a Reagan or a Bush or a Cheney...

"...the horror...the horror...?


Morocco Bama said...

What's ironic about this Healthcare Bill is that it was written by the Insurance and Pharmaceutical Companies....and that's why the Dems are so adamant about passing it. They are passing this bill for who they truly represent. Hell, if it was just for little old you and me, it would never have passed.

The Republican opposition to this bill is hypocrisy and a feigned show of dissent.

I like how the Dems are sticking it to the rednecks, though, in regards to the Tanning Salon tax to help fund the bill. If that doesn't make them revolt, nothing will.

Marketing's come a long way, hasn't it?

Morocco Bama said...

There are some real annoying fucking windbags on the RI Forum, are there not? How do they find the time to post their incessant diatribes. c2w comes to mind. Alice, the navel gazer, is another, but substitute Jews for navel with her. Seriously, that chick sees Jews everywhere. Can you imagine trying to have sex with a chick who can't stop thinking about and talking about Jews? The thought makes me nauseous. And then there's the poster worship that goes on at those places....and it's always the male posters coming to the rescue of the female posters. Alice has a throng of men, including Sounder and Nordic, who must jump to her rescue whenever a challenger comes her way. People are so fucking predictable. They socially recreate their miserable real life existences on those forums, or pretend to be what they never could be IRL. Either way, they accomplish nothing more than that abstract reality.

I like your approach much better. You blow off steam and don't take yourself too seriously.

just_another_dick said...

M.B., glad you could pop in for a moment.

The Dem/Repub divide is just a badly written, badly acted version of good cop/bad cop. Americans, being the credulous illiterate yahoos that they are, fall for it every fucking time.

It doesn't take much digging to find that the divide is about as wide as a pubic hair.
Just take NAFTA, begun with Reagan, midwifed by Bush the Wimp, and finally delivered into the world, all gooey & bloody, by big ol' Bill "Vaginal Humidor" Clinton.

Or, even closer in time, the big bail-out. Started by Bush under threats of possible martial law, shot down once under public pressure, then quickly brought back to life & rammed home by the Democrats.

These folk achieve a surprising amount of non-partisan cooperation when their plans service the wealthy, don't ya think?

As far as the Forum goes, I couldn't agree more. It's too PC for me. I use it more as a quick clearinghouse for articles I may miss because I don't have my entire life to spend on a computer.
Obviously, these folk do nothing but surf the web.

I think the fem defenders are probably hoping, like all passive/aggressive male fem defenders everywhere, that it will all somehow eventually lead to a blow job.