Sunday, March 6, 2011

Here's A Tiny Bit Of Human Fuckness For Y'all

Since I've been re-assigned to babysit a client who has yet to be released from the psych ward, I am pretty much a third wheel there. Consequently, they move me around from building to building to fill staffing shortages.
On Saturday night, that lucky building's manager received a call from one of the client's mothers. She wanted the facility to retrieve her son and return him to the facility because she was unable to do it.
The manager agreed to come and quickly nominated me as designated driver.

It turned out that my destination was a precinct house.

Mom was in jail. That was why she couldn't bring him back.

One of the officers explained that B's mother was evidently blowing a man for drug money or drugs with B in the room watching just as the cops conducted a raid of that particular drug dealer.

Now, imagine that. This kid's mom was blowing a guy while her retarded son watched.

& they wonder why this kid continually fixates sexually on certain female staff.

B. looks like the Christmas Story kid only 20 pounds skinnier & sporting a crew cut.

He ambulates by dragging his legs behind him as he pulls himself along the floor.

He speaks relatively coherently, so all night he kept saying "she was blowing him & they arrested her. I hate them."
Then he'd bawl a bit & the tape loop would return to the beginning & start all over again.

Like a funeral dirge.

13 comments:

Morocco Bama said...

Richard, if they decide to return him to the mother when she is released because of prison funding shortfalls, a nice parting present from you would be a Sling Blade, although some call it a Kaiser Blade...uh hum. That's what I call Justice.

Morocco Bama said...

Someone posted this over at RI, and it's a good one. I know you'll get a kick out of it.....I did.

http://rigorousintuition.ca/board2/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=9066&start=3030

You have to love that name....Dick Armey. You can't make that shit up! What a fuckin (haha....pun intended) name. Don't do a google search unless you want a bunch of search results returned for porn sites.

When are we going to get a Congress Critter named Ass Wipe, or Anal Rape?

just_another_dick said...

Shit Mr. M., that is the plot to Sling Blade isn't it?
If I knew I was going to live out movie plots, I would have steered myself towards porn instead of an indie film that gave the world Billy Bob.

Dick Army thinks Beck is spewing Phd dissertations?

Alrighty then.

Someone should point out to Beck & his Dick that true liberal socialism died around WW1.
Everything since has been corporate capitalism's toothless & co-opted little lap bitch.

Morocco Bama said...

You'll love this, Richard. Maybe that new employee who is a big fan of Charlie Sheen's, can land a job as his intern this summer. It pays for Charlie to be outrageous.

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/Behind-Sheens-tweet-a-new-apf-1199903699.html?x=0&sec=topStories&pos=4&asset=&ccode=

NEW YORK (AP) -- It isn't just "tiger blood" fueling Charlie Sheen's tweeting: There's a new world of social media advertising hidden behind his micro-blogging, too.

Shortly before Warner Bros. Television announced Monday that it had fired Sheen from the CBS hit sitcom "Two and a Half Men," the actor tweeted that he wants to hire an intern to assist him. But the tweet also was a paid-for endorsement from the year-old website Internships.com, which claims to be the world's largest internship marketplace.

"I'm looking to hire a winning INTERN with TigerBlood," read the message, with a link to the site.

The job posting on Internships.com describes the position as a paid, eight-week job for the summer to "work closely with Charlie Sheen in leveraging his social network."

The partnership was arranged by startup ad.ly, which connects celebrities with advertisers for social media ads. Sheen officially signed on with ad.ly after the Beverly Hills, Calif.-based company consulted with him last week to familiarize him with Twitter.

Ad.ly earlier helped Sheen join Twitter and get his account immediately verified so that users could separate the real Sheen from the many copycat accounts. Sheen took little more than a day to reach 1 million followers, a record. He had more than 2 million followers as of early Tuesday.

All the attention has brought a huge amount of exposure to the business of social media advertising. Though companies have been working advertisements into Twitter and Facebook for more than two years, it's a sometimes unnoticed practice.

"A lot of people know about the business now," says Ad.ly CEO Arnie Gullov-Singh. "It's a validation of the business that we're building and the overall industry changes that we're a part of."

Micro-endorsements can net a celebrity anywhere from $1,000 to the low five figures per tweet, with ad.ly's top celebrities earning about $10,000 per tweet. Ad.ly and Internships.com declined to discuss the financial arrangements of the deal with Sheen. Pricing is frequently structured on the number of clicks an advertiser gets via the ad, with $1 to $2 per click.

ericswan said...

Are you kidding? Someone actually "wondered" why the kid is fixated? Naw..you must padding your cell bud.

just_another_dick said...

So M.B., does this mean that Mr. Sheen's latest escapades are just fluffy PR for his lucrative new career as Tweety Bird, the Tweeting Huckster?

Maybe Two & 1/2 Men was getting old.
Maybe he discovered he could make money Tweeting while still laying pipe in a porn queen, a perk his acting gig couldn't cover.

I'm still wondering why Americans get all "moral" when it involves fucking or personal drug usage, but still remain blissfully amoral when it comes to slaughter and bloodshed.

Just a bunch of Victorian curmudgeons I suppose.

Eric, as unbelievable as it sounds, they do wonder. But, given that our psychologist is as psycho-tropically medicated as any of the clients, this really shouldn't be all that surprising.
Seriously, you have to pry that bitch out of her office with a crowbar.
& when she does appear, your odds of finding her lucid & actually helpful are woefully slim.

Like I always say pal, 'Better living through chemistry.'

Morocco Bama said...

Richard, probably not as sinister as that, or intentional, but there does seem to be remuneration for everything a celebrity does these days. In this case, Twitter's like a barnacle on Charlie Sheen's whale. Everything must be capitalized on and exploited....no opportunity to suck more juice from the lemon should ever be overlooked. It's there for the taking. It'd be foolish not to take it, and so take it they do....from those who give it willingly.

And personally, Richard, I could give a rat's ass what Charlie Sheen does. I don't even really know who he is or what he's done. I don't know the show that you're talking about, and except for Wall Street, I don't recollect ever seeing him in anything I have ever watched in the past, although I do hear his name bandied about quite a bit, so maybe there's a PR angle to that. Either way, fuck them, they aren't getting my dime, or my attention. I wish they would all just immolate themselves, truthfully.

ericswan said...

Wouldn't it be great if you could post pics of your everyday operation?

just_another_dick said...

You're lucky Mr. B., I'm surrounded by people who obsess over "celebrity gone bad."
Working with TV addicts who psychologically cripple themselves trying to emulate what they see on that little box can be entertaining, don't get me wrong...but, personally, I'd rather avoid it all.
I do when I'm at home.
As far as I'm concerned Chuck can burst into flames & blow away in a puff of smoke.
Wouldn't change my life one little bit either way.

Honestly M.B., these days I think that the only thing keeping me out of a clock tower with a few rifles & a few duffle bags of ammo is my love for my wife & children.

Eric, what you're talking about is a Federal offense.
That's not to say that it wouldn't be amusing.

just_another_dick said...

One more thing M.B.,

There are fake Charlie Sheens Tweeting on Twitter?

Is this a common phenomena?

One more thing PT.2:

My daughters 5th grade class was asked, by their teacher, to raise their hand if they had a cell phone.

Only my daughter & her best friend didn't raise their hands.

Is this the start of 4G class war?

ericswan said...

I just listened to Power Hour describing the treatment by your Federal government of PFC Manning, the apparent whiz kid with access to every single communication the government has ever entertained. 23 hours of solitary, 1 hour a day of dragging heavy chains around in a rec area and his sleep time of 7 hours must be stark naked as it is suspected he could injure himself if he is wearing bed clothes. Did I neglect to mention that his waking hours are spent answering the question "So how are you?" every five minutes. And then there is that statistic that the U.S. has 2.5 million citizens in detention.

Anonymous said...

@Richard--
That is just an unbelievably sad story. Heartbreaking for that poor kid.

@Eric--
Yes, that is correct. And most people in this fuckwad country don't even know who he is, much less care that people are being tortured in our name.

just_another_dick said...

Mr. A, sad is the emotion of the day where I work. Currently, the guy I'm supposed to babysit has returned. He's so fucking medicated that he can't even manage to navigate his spoon.
A month & 1/2 ago he was shattering wire reinforced glass with one punch & he had the entire staff, except me, completely terrified. Now he looks like a doddering old zombie who can't even manage to feed himself.

I'd quit if I could.

This is wrong on more levels than I can comprehend.