21st century America is soooooooooo fucking cool. Each day is a potential foray into an action flick. Luckily it was a false alarm.
Maybe we can convince Steven Seagal & his millions of hours of weapons training to journey here for a little posse forming.
I also think the whole "lockdown" plan is utterly brilliant. First you lock the shooter in with the kids. Then you lock the kids in their classrooms behind doors with big fucking glass windows in them.
From what I understand, primarily from the voices in my head, glass is an excellent bullet repellant.
I bet you didn't know that.
A student's outgoing voice mail message quoting the theme to "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" led to a school lockdown in Ambridge, Pa.
The Times Online in Beaver, Pa., explains what happened. A receptionist from a doctor's office called to remind student Travis Clawson about an upcoming appointment. Clawson didn't pick up, so the call went to voice mail.
The receptionist heard what sounded like a threat about "shooting" and "school" on Clawson's outgoing message. Apparently, the message was intended to quote a lyric from the Will Smith sitcom's theme song that goes, "And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school." It's unclear if the receptionist misheard Clawson's message or if the student altered the lyrics.
The receptionist notified police, who notified school officials, who instituted a lockdown on every school in the county. After 20 frantic minutes, authorities located Clawson in the high school's guidance counselor's office.
Police took him into custody and interviewed him. It was then that Clawson explained his message was just a riff on the popular '90s sitcom about a young Philadelphia man who goes to live with his "auntie and uncle in Bel Air." According to Times Online, District Attorney Anthony Berosh said that after listening to the message closely it was determined that it did follow the Quincy Jones-penned song. Clawson was released and no charges were filed.
No word on whether he said "Smell ya later" upon being cleared.