Thursday, May 20, 2010

Look Yahweh, It's Time To Make Good On All Those Apocalyptic Threats...Time For A Good Flood Or Plague...So Shit Or Get Off The Pot Motherfucker

Yesterday morning I had a pleasant visit from the grass & tree limb police. (Really, they had badges & everything) They informed me that my neighbors have complained that the 5 pine trees at the edge of my property obscure their view of the road. While I have no problems, I understand how they could since none of these inbred halfwits appear to possess any driving skills.
So, in order to keep the Grass Police from ordering me to cut down my trees, I had to spend most of yesterday cutting off all the bottom branches that I could reach. I loved those damn trees the way they were.
By the conclusion of my endeavor I was suitably pissed off, and wanting to do nothing more than raise my middle finger in a nice neighborly salute, I took 2 huge sheets of poster board, wrote this on one;

TREE LIMB REMOVAL BROUGHT TO YOU BY
THE STATE STREET WHINERS CLUB

OUR MOTTO IS
HUUUUUUUUUUWAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

and placed it right in front of my mutilated trees.

On the second one I put

CAN YOU SEE ME NOW
YOU CROSS-EYED INBRED???


& stuck it about 50 feet up the road from the trees.

This morning I awoke to find my mailbox post yanked out of the ground
and my mailbox smashed to bits.

In the immortal words of Yosemite Sam:

This means war!!!!!!

11 comments:

ericswan said...

Now Dick; let's not be testy here. Let me tell you my neighbour nightmare.

Belliosto said...

I'm waiting ericswan.

BP said...

I'm everyone's favorite neighbor.

I make things just a little bit better.

Say hey.

ericswan said...

Paul said (May 24, 2010):


I just wanted to bring to your attention one unusual detail concerning the spill that is worth noticing: the spill happened on April 20, which fact is, I think, extremely, extremely suspicious.

As you're probably aware, the April 19/20 time frame is extremely important in the High Occult. One might even go so far as to say that April 20 bears the same significance to Satanists that the date of December 25 does to Christians. Alleged it is the birth date of Adolf Hitler (although, imho, it's just as possible that Mr. Schicklgruber may have conveniently "changed" his real birth date, at the same time he adopted his more convincing "nom-de-guerre" of Hitler, so as to more dramatically "impress" his Satanist friends). It's also the date that a number of other prominent "burnt sacrificial offerings" have occurred, including Columbine, Waco and other atrocities.

Indeed, even the American Revolution began on this date (in 1775), which, I think, can hardly be a "coincidence"..

This year, a number of my friends and myself were all sitting around, anticipating and attempting to "predict" what sort of "burnt sacrificial offering" the Illuminati were going to stage for this year's April 20 sacrifice.

It was only about a week after the fire was set in the Gulf, that one of us looked back and said: "A-ha! That oil fire and spill in the Gulf were set on April 20!"

More than likely, the Gulf fire is this year's ritual "burnt" sacrifice, in celebration of the April 20 (Satanic) High Holy Day.

Morocco Bama said...

Okay, that was me as BP. Poor taste, I know, but I also know that Richard enjoys poor taste.

I hope Richard isn't in jail.

The Rusty Wire that holds the anger in is severed. The top's about to come off. And suddenly it's day again.

Belliosto said...

Miss USA = sacrificial victim?

To seek approval and acceptance from American (read:Anglo) society by an Arab or Muslim in America at a time like this is as ludicrous as a Vietnamese seeking acceptance from American society in the 60s and 70s instead of focusing their energies on putting an end to the carpet bombing and use of napalm on fellow Vietnamese.

It's as ridiculous as an Algerian seeking acceptance into French society during the zenith of Algeria's colonization or a Black slave presenting his best appearance to his master during the transatlantic slave trade. It is even more ridiculous when such validation arrives in the sexist, degrading vehicle of a beauty pageant. The image of the bellydancing, exotic harem girl permeates Western imagination of the Arab world. The physical requirements of winning a beauty pageant do not differ significantly. The image of a bikini-wearing Arab is not exactly a radical shift from the characters of Arabian Nights.

There is an Arab American pressure of proving their humanity to the West. But many Arabs believe that this burden should rest on the West to prove their humanity to Arabs and Muslims because the US, the greatest purveyor of violence in the world today, according to MLK Jr., is occupying Afghanistan and Iraq.

The negative stereotypes of Arabs and Muslims do not have to be challenged in the West for Arab Americans to gain political clout and influence foreign policy.

Humanizing the victim in the perspective of the aggressor is not a prerequisite to liberation. If anything, it's a stalling technique to postpone venturing outside one's comfort zone in order to stand up for justice. I am not aware of any successful liberation campaign that suspended its demand for justice pending successful humanization of the victim in the oppressor's eyes. This "strategy" certainly did not preclude MLK Jr. from condemning his government's policies towards Vietnam while simultaneously working to end Jim Crow and desegregate the south.

In any case, an Arab winning the beauty pageant does not threaten the status quo, as the US does not categorically reject Arabs occupying high-profile and even powerful establishment positions. The US cannot genuinely claim that it respects Rima Fakih while it continues to imprison, torture, rape, and bomb our sisters in Afghanistan and Iraq. It is not the case that the US may consider respecting its Afghani and Iraqi female hostages after an Arab Muslim wins a beauty pageant. The opposite is more likely true; true respect for an Arab beauty pageant and her entire ethnicity and religion may stand a chance only after Afghanistan and Iraq are fully decolonized.

If the strategy of humanizing Arabs and Muslims first as a step towards eventually achieving Arab and Muslim political influence has any merit, what greater agent for humanization is there than opposing the inhumane occupations? If we want to give ourselves a human face before the American public, what better way to accomplish that than to express genuine concern for the lives and self-determination of those under brutal military occupation?

I can't blame Arab Americans for feeling happy about Fakih's new title despite its glaring problems. But the yearning for the elusive carrot of acceptance by a society that overwhelmingly continues to acquiesce, if not support, colonization of two Muslim countries is an exercise in futility.

by Qais Nawwaf in the May 22-28 edition of The Arab American News.

just_another_dick said...

Eric, I was testy wasn't I?
Put it down to internet fueled paranoia.

Shrub, I actually liked the damn video.
Well, liked is probably the wrong word.
More like fucking hilarious man.

I really enjoyed the little God-like beam of light illuminating our wondrous BP future.

I also think BP is incredibly prescient. In this ad they're practically guaranteeing that one day, with amazing BP POWER, we'll be able to swim in the air. I think this will be much appreciated now that they've gone & fucked up the oceans
with such God-like efficiency.

Sad to say, I'm not in jail.
Just working a lot.
The war petered out.
I found the whole "not having a concrete enemy" confusion to be a big stumbling block.
Only a man of George Bush's caliber can just shoot at anybody all willy nilly & gunfighter-y.
I tried to call in a CSI A-Team comprised of David Caruso, Gary Sinise & William Peterson, but all my attempts were met with rude
"They're fucking actors you blithering idiot" comments.
Who are these people kidding?
Actors?
Pshaw!
Trying to convince me the TV tells lies.
For shame.


We had a service for the mail box 2 days ago.
All his friends came.
The garbage cans were weeping sludgy rain water.
The recycle bins were kind enough to drag themselves off of the porch before noon.
His family arrived by FedEx & UPS, a fact that would have chapped his ass were he still with us.

Father O'Maily said some very nice things about him.
I slipped something in his envelope as a bit of a token.

What I'm trying to say Shrub, is that I've achieved a bit of closure here
so I'm willing to move on.

Let bygones be bygones, if ya know what I mean?

Mr. B., if the winner of the Miss America Pageant was chosen due to her race, it would be a nice insipidly PC ending to an insipidly PC pageant.
I've seen the last 2 at work & I generally just want to claw my own eyes out.
Coincidentally, right after the swim suit parade.

The Q & A is so gut churning. Either these women are complete nitwits or they're incoherent & disjointed answers betray the inherent impossibility of holding a completely politically correct viewpoint on anything.

Jeez, we slaughter & torture oodles of animals, spew our toxic ooze all over creation, turn our military loose on anybody who doesn't get with the red, white & blue program, yet we're paralyzed at the thought of hurting someone's feelings.
It seems, oh, I don't know, a bit odd.

In the immortal words of Tom Waits,

"We're all mad here."

ericswan said...

April 20 hmmm.

11 deaths

the platform was sunk after the fire had been extinguished.

order out of Chaos.

Goldman Sachs shorted all stocks related to the Gulf of Mexico.

Reuters - Halliburton agrees to buy Boots & Coots (Oil Cleanup Company) 10 days before Oil Spill
http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSTRE63907A20100410

Reuters - Halliburton performed cementing work on the well just before it ruptured
http://www.reuters.com/article/idUSN1922613220100519

Halliburton consulted a local B.C. man about using zeolite to make "lightweight concrete". There is only one way to break down concrete that uses zeolite as a pozzalin. Expose it to salt.

BP filled the pipe with saltwater after it had been advised to fill it with drilling mud.

The rig that blew up was over-insured by $270 million. Fascinating coincidence!

Hmm. Did BP hold dead peasant insurance on the rig workers who died?

Via: Politico:

Eighteen Democratic senators have asked the Justice Department to investigate the operator of the Deepwater Horizon offshore drilling rig after the company announced it would dole out $1 billion to shareholders as oil continues to pour into the Gulf of Mexico.

Transocean, according to the letter from the senators, plans to distribute dividends to its stockholders. And the senators are concerned that the payments might make it harder to collect liability payouts related to the massive oil spill.

Transocean, according to the letter, also says it will make a $270 million profit on the insurance policy for the rig. And the senators claim the rig was insured for more than it was worth

just_another_dick said...

I don't know Eric, although I'm more willing to entertain the occult meme these days.
The problem with the "Satanic" angle is that it's culture specific & confined to Western traditions that were born in the Middle East.
For example, Buddhists & Hindus don't recognize Satan.
I think it's hard, given the way Christianity is embedded in our language, to see it as somehow universal.

Having said that, I think you'll enjoy this.

ericswan said...

http://pesn.com/2010/05/05/9501645_No_joke--

Goldman_Sachs_shorted_TransOcean/DonNicoloff_email.htm

Morocco Bama said...

Goldman Sachs, and Wall Street in general, has shorted the entire universe. It's what they do. We should exhume Robert Mitchum and have him do some new PR commercials for Wall Street. Instead of "beef....it's what's for dinner" in his grizzled, husky, smoker's voice, he can say "shorting the universe....it's what we do."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VvvAp-2v4o&feature=related