Monday, September 24, 2012

Do think that the world will soon flush itself down the toidy?

Do you feel that the day of the narcissistic meat suit is drawing to a close?

Are you afraid that you'll spend humanities last days in an underground bunker with no one other than Thumbelina  & her four sisters? Or maybe that your last days will go sour because you forgot to pack the batteries for your vibrator?

Then I have the web site for you:

Survivalist Singles

According to the SS web site

See why Survivalist Singles is the fastest growing relationship site on the web. Create your Survivalist Singles profile to begin the exciting journey towards finding your match. (Hopefully this will be a short journey world's gonna end)
Here you can meet folk like manwithaplan:

who is 59 years old and

a hard working engineer for a global corporation and now ready to get a life!! I've been prepping for 3 years and things are coming together. A like-minded women would be my prized preparation. (especially if I can lure her into my bunker just long enough to handcuff her to a bed)

or whitetiger

a 61 year old woman who has

time this past year, due to a major health crises and near death experience, to realize that I need to pursue what I want in life now, instead of just settling and feeling limited by my circumstances...(one has to wonder how much longer she thinks she'll survive whether the world ends or doesn't end).
or BohemianGirl, a 44 year old woman who is looking for

a partner that can keep me laughing. Someone who is motivated, who can engage in stimulating conversation, a renaissance man would be perfect. (After all, nothing beats a constant stream of one liners & pithy conversation when a zombie horde of starving humans are pounding on your bunker's doors, eh?)

Personally, I'd go for Larkspur_Maiden who is a

19 year old brunette with hazel eyes, weigh 115 pounds, and am 5ft 7inchs tall. I'm a newbies to prepping and survival-ism. I'm interested in learning how to hunt and tan hides. How to catch, grow, and preserve my own food. I'm planning on living a migratory lifestyle in the woods until i can start my own off the grid farm.  (So if you see a nubile young thing with spelling & syntax issues flitting through a forest near you I'd suggest that a trail of hunting magazines strategically interspersed with some hide tanning tools would be your best bet at luring her into your bunker.)
But I'd steer clear of the Baconator,

a 25 year old married man who "isn't bitter because he's single," since no one needs a bunker bound love triangle when the shit is hitting the fan (a favorite phrase of survivalists everywhere).

So, happy dating. And may Cupid's arrow not only find you your heart's desire, but also take out a deer or two so you & your survivalist soul mate can have dinner for a few days.

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